The Silent Treatment
By Doug Bing, Washington Conference president
Have you ever been given the silent treatment?
Maybe you have given the silent treatment to someone. You get frustrated or annoyed, and for whatever reason, you decide not to talk to the person you are frustrated with.
There is a story of a Japanese man named Otou Katayama who decided to give his wife the silent treatment. His wife, Yumi, had just given birth to their first child, and Otou felt that she was giving all her attention to the baby. He was feeling left out and wanted more attention from her. So he just stopped talking to her.
This didn’t just last a day or two, or even a month or two — this went on for two decades. He refused to talk to his wife. Amazingly, they stayed married and even had more children together while he was refusing to speak to her. He would nod and occasionally grunt in response.
Finally, in 2017, his now adult children asked a TV show to help resolve this standoff. They had never seen their parents have a conversation. So, in the same park where the couple had first met, Otou finally spoke. He asked forgiveness and expressed gratitude that Yumi had stayed with him through this very long trial and hardship he had put her through. Forgiveness was granted, and the silent treatment was broken.
I can just say “wow” when I think of his long-suffering wife through all those years of silence. I am also impressed with her forgiveness. Luke 17:4 speaks of forgiveness and says, “And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns to you, saying, ‘I repent,’ you shall forgive him” (NKJV).
Jesus said in the model prayer,
Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.
He has done this for the world for much longer than twenty years. Jesus has extended forgiveness to each of us throughout our lifetimes. He asks us to do the same.
To willingly extend forgiveness may not be easy. In fact, it may be one of the most difficult things you do. Yet Jesus, in extending forgiveness to us, gave it all up in order to forgive and make a path forward for each of us.